Amid our season of Sabbath we had a whirlwind of excitement these last two weeks.
First, my folks came to visit.
What a joy it was to see the boys enjoy the time with my parents. Lets not forget how much Saoirse-girl loves her Granddad, too. Catching up, playing wii, Chick fil-A, Jake and I had a date, church, Black Bear Diner, swimming, etc. It was such a blessing for us when my parents took the boys for a few hours so Jake and I could have a date. Since leavning CA that doesn't happen regularly anymore, so it's a treat when it does happen. Of course the boys were elated... who wouldn't be happy with the combo of grandparents, Chick fil-A, swimming, and wii, all in one afternoon?
It was nice to see my parents again. Bless their hearts, they've been up to visit twice since we moved. We get to return the favor, sort of, in November except they won't be where we will be. We'll be glad to see them at my cousin's wedding.
Then, my friend Monica and I went to the dōTERRA Post Convention Tour in town on the Wednesday. It was a low-key event packed with information! We got to hear about the 15 new products dōTERRA launched this summer (I already had the kit and sampled all the things). The speaker shared about the company's Healing Hands Foundation. What an incredible organization! We also go to see some of the powerpoint presentation slides used at the Convention. One slide is a skeletal timeline that shows the following:
2008 - dōTERRA was born
2009 - first $1 Million month
2014 - new campus
2015 - $1 Billion in sales
2018 - 5,000,000 WA & WC (combined Wellness Advocates and Wholesale Customers)
The future is bright for this young company who seems to be doing it all right. I am so honored to be connected with this company and that Dempsey (and our whole family) is THRIVING, in part, because of it. I currently have 76 people on my team and I am always looking to have it grow. Let me know if you are interested in the essential oil lifestyle and/or running your own business in partnership with this amazing company. #shamelessplug
Next, Jake's folks came to visit. They were here for just three days... but it was a fun-filled three days. Swimming at the YMCA, a birthday dinner, the Zoo Boise, looking at property, an ice cream date, homemade meals, Boise Fry Co for lunch, a park visit, a puzzle, laughter, etc. This was the first time Gram and Grampa have visited Boise. We're sure it made such a lovely impression on them that they will visit again soon. The boys were so excited to share about their life here in Idaho and even more excited to visit the YMCA and play on a water slide and such. Dempsey was actually able to show them his ocelot at the Zoo Boise... granted, he still hasn't designed his plaque to be displayed on the exhibit. Sharing Boise Fry Co was a treat as well. This is the boys' favorite burger joint up here... but it's pricey, so we don't frequent the establishment often. Locally sourced ingredients, organic when possible. Our party of six went to Fork (a restaurant in downtown) for Gram's birthday dinner before they departed. Another yummy experience.
We are so thankful both sets of grandparents were here in such a short span of time.
Finally, we met a family in the middle of their own faith journey. My cousin, Kallie, connected me a woman named Rachel. She is an author, speaker, and life coach. We were able to go visit her co-owned 60 acre ranch a bit north of us and meet her energetic family. What a lovely experience. Getting to ride in the bed of a truck while bouncing over hills and spotting deer was a highlight for our boys. We shared a meal, they shared their trampoline, we shared our story, they shared their story... all beautiful. The Lord has both families on faith journeys right now... theirs just seems to be a bit more glamorous on the outside. See, they are in the process of funding a HUGE renovation of a ranch from rundown to renewed event center (think retreats, weddings, corporate events, etc). The are calling this place Seven Springs Ranch. We can't wait to watch as this property and dream unfold into reality. What's even crazier is that I looked at that property last year on Realtor.com and would dream about the possibilities. Now, I get to watch God use it in ways similar to what I envisioned.
Who doesn't love a good food post to bring on all the insane munchies and comparison issues? I know, right?! So, in the spirit of being a good socialmediaist, here are some food shots from Kenagyville - Idaho edition.
Still no jobs. While that gives us some moments of concern, we are happy to be able to share so much uninterrupted time together as a family unit. We know that most families never have this opportunity and we are soaking it up. Despite not having Mon-Fri jobs, we are still earning an income. How? Through NeoLife and doTERRA. Did you know that those are two business we are a part of? No, I don't have to actively sell items (neither do my teammates). We are earning money simply because people have prioritized their family's health in such a way that incorporates whole food nutritionals and essential oils. As they purchase the products for their family's consumption and enjoyment, we earn a commission. It's such a beautiful thing... residual income. If you are ready to join my team of wise, health-conscious folks, please reach out to me or visit the links above.
Visits to Manitou Park
Jake's assembled birthday present: Lego Saturn V
The boys and I got Jake the Lego Saturn V for his birthday this year. I think he's been talking about it for a few years now, so we felt it was time. Not to mention we had plenty of time to dedicate to building it. The boys worked on it in stages. It was enjoyable for all three of them. The best part? Jake set up time with each boy to play with it. What a good daddy!
Me, Kamatz, and Morning Tea
Military Reserve sunrise, Storey Park play, Foundation Training
As you can see, there is plenty happening. Lots of park visits, including dog parks (not shown because it's hard to get pics while making sure Saoirse behaves herself and remains safe. Saoirse loves being outside and going for walks. She thoroughly enjoys the dog park experience and is typically asleep before we get home (very much like a child). Dempsey, like Saoirse, requires ample opportunity to release his energy stores. We've noticed he does better, overall, on days he gets to go to a park and be active. It's different in Idaho because we don't have access to our trampoline, which is what he would use daily to burn energy, build muslces, and blow off steam.
Morning tea is vital for my psyche. Chai Rooibos from Yogi is my favorite right now. Add to it some raw honey and a little milk (I still need to find a new raw milk supplier) and I'm good to go. Jake has been enjoying an orange flavored tea.
Kamatz still resides in our bedroom most hours of the day. He emerges at night to eat and go potty. Why? Our best guess is that he smells the landlord's dog and cat around the house and he believes they're still here - which they are not. Not to mention that he isn't really fond of Saoirse. At night, when she's in her crate, he feels safe enough to handle his basic natural needs. Now, when anyone is in the bedroom longer than 3 seconds, he appears and is quite meowthy until you give him love/ attention. He purrs louder and drools more here. I think he is just so desperate for affection he can't contain himself. Idiot doesn't realize we are available all day long outside the bedroom.
Foundation Training was awesome. It has some similarities to yoga as it only uses your body and focuses on stretching. My chiropractor, Dr John Hickey, is the only certified Foundation Training Instructor in Idaho. He is passionate about helping people take care of their whole self... not merely get adjusted and go on their way. Know what else is fun about Dr John? He's letting me help him with his website... I'm working behind the scenes right now, so none of my work is published for you to see yet.
The air continues to crisp up and we enjoyed some rain a few days ago. I've always loved the smell of rain and it is no different here. Jake and I both walk Saoirse is the dark morning hours in our turn. The main difference is I walk her to Dutch Bros where she gets a treat and I get caffeinated. Jake walks her around the streets in the hood and often takes her to the military reserve (that awesome sunrise photo). Yesterday, Saturday, I took Saoirse to Dutch Bros and then to a dog park. It was still dark when we arrived at Morris Hill Dog Park at 7am. Around 7:30am another pair showed up. A woman and her pup, Jules. The woman and I had a lovely chat. The kind of lovely chat you have when the person you're talking to is of the same mindset you are. It was such an enoyable connection that we exchanged phone numbers and are making plans to meet at the dog park again or for coffee, at the very least. It is so much easier to meet people here. Why? Because people TALK TO YOU here. They genuinely care about your story and they are quick to share their story as well. It's beautiful and this extrovert loves it!
We have missed church for two Sundays now due to head colds. When we are sick we stay home. We want to make friends, not enemies, and keeping people not sick is a good way to do that. The hard part is the church we have enjoyed attending (twice) doesn't stream online or record their sermons. Thankfully we have other churches nationwide that do.
Dempsey has had two appointments at St Luke's thus far and his third is coming up the end of this month. This one will be his first procedure day at St Luke's. I think Jake and I are a little nervous, with it being a new place, new routine and all, but Dempsey is excited, of course. We are beyond grateful for Dempsey's positive outlook on this whole journey. I still hope and pray we get to end his treatment early (for a myriad of reasons) but, if we can't, then I am being blessed by Dempsey's success and attitude about it all. It is incredible how he just owns his journey, never complains, and trusts us even when it's hard. He is a walking miracle. We are deeply thankful for your continued support, presence, and prayers over our marathon with cancer.
By the way, the cancer thing doesn't end when his treatment does. He will not hear the term cure until he is just shy of 13 yrs old (EOT 8/5/19; 13th birthday 8/17/24) . Then, we will always have that fear living in our biology, if not the forefront of our minds. He will always have to be more diligent than the average person. Any little physical blip and those fears will come flooding back. So, the marathon doesn't end when treatment does and we don't fool ourselves into thinking any different. God is good. He is faithful. He is IN IT WITH US. He is for us. He is orchestrating a tapestry that is larger and more glorious than we can imagine and we are honored to be woven into it.
At many points throughout the day I find myself still trying to believe that we are REALLY IN IDAHO.
I mean, we drive around the valley and we can see for MILES. The air is clear and turning crisp. The traffic is non-existent (except to the natives). The fact that we can cover 26 miles in 27 minutes is surreal to this CA native. The population density of Boise is 3,500 people per square mile compared to Whittier's 6,000 people per square mile (according to 2016 data)! No wonder it feels less crowded... it IS less crowded.
We drove back from Middleton in the 8 o'clock hour. The moon was high in the east and still waxing. The clouds dark and eerily lit with the moon reflecting sunlight. The west sky was still showing remnants of the day's light. The low sky not polluted with light from big cities that never sleep. A stillness I haven't felt in a very long time. Several points of concern as we drive along country roads that have minimal lighting - the downside of night driving in a small town is what allows for this beauty we were able to behold in the nighttime hours.
I mean, we are financially secure right now. We have a stable living place that is a win-win situation for the time at hand. We are soaking up so much family time it's unreal. It is a miracle we're living in. We have food in our fridge and stomachs, warm beds to sleep in at night, a comfy couch for when Sabbath sneaks up on you and requires a nap, a yard big enough for the dog to get her energy out, a garden that continues to provide a bounty we don't have to stress over, folage that requires just enough tending to in order to keep us occupied, a grocery store within walking distance, a sweet church down the street to attend, culture hub just minutes away, so much to explore, cars that function well, a hospital that is high quality (for something in a broken system), children who are amazing in every way... the list goes on. Y'all, sometimes it just feels like too much good for such a broken person like myself. This really is a season of REST, of faith, of learning to quiet the distractions and my spirit enough to hear the still small voice of God.
For reals... we made steak for lunch paired with delicious, fresh veggies. Then we had a delicious meal with special friends (this family is a true blessing to us). The husband and wife were so willing to speak hard, honest truths to Sawyer as he sat in conversation with the adults. This couple is willing to be vulnerable with our boy so that he can learn to lean into the Lord when his sin nature gets too strong instead of leaning into his own will power. What a blessing! It was perfect. It was real. It was holy. It was church.
We took a trip into Emmett just to snoop around. The city park was nice and we found an amazing viewpoint. Not sure we'd want to live in this city but it was fun to explore for a few hours. Here is a collage of photos...
I fully believe God has blessed me (us) with a season of rest. I am working to soak it up and allow it to bring the healing I so desperately need. Did you know something can be easy and hard at the same time? Truth. This "rest" thing is both easy and hard.
I have long been somewhat of a controlling person. Not so much controlling others but one who likes to have control of her life, her schedule, etc. I don't very much fancy having people tell me what to do, what I should do, or what I shouldn't do for that matter. I like to make my own decisions and I am prepared to handle the repercussions of those decisions, should any arise.
Enter the Idaho vision. This was not a vision of my own creating. Nope, it was a God-given notion. One he gave this concrete- loving city girl four years ago (2014). God made it so heavy on my heart that Jake and I created a three-year CA exit strategy. That didn't work. Probably because that wasn't part of God's original vision. Ya think?! Two years in we had made ZERO headway with the exit strategy. In fact, it looked like we were never going to leave because God brought Dempsey's cancer journey to us and made it front and center. Complete with crippling PTSD for me, a heavy load for Jake's shoulders, a mine field for Sawyer's brother heart, and a battlefield much larger than our warrior has yet to grasp.
In addition to all of this, the Lord also brought a Holistic Nutritionist certification to me, more experience with whole food supplementation, more understanding of essential oil benefits, a deepening discipleship relationship with a dear sage (who remains a pilar for me when needed), a willingness to be broken in the hopes of feeling true redemption from this world... and more.
You know what? After I received the Idaho vision, other people received a similar vision. You know what else? Those people MADE IT TO IDAHO BEFORE ME. Do you have any idea how frustrating that is? Let me tell you... IT'S FRUSTRATING. It felt like people were cutting in line and this justice-loving, control freak doesn't appreciate that. BUT, and it's a big "but", I was able to receive advice and guidance from that sage I mentioned earlier. She could speak into my journey from a few steps ahead. It's amazing the wisdom you can gain from that scenario but it doesn't always lessen the frustration.
Fast forward to today and I'm sitting here typing to you from IDAHO. Talk about a dream come true. Granted, the path to the dream was not smooth. Instead it looked more like intense switchbacks with thorny vines at your ankles and rude branches sticking out over the path just far enough to poke you in the face or snag your clothes. There were setbacks brought on by personal exhaustion and exterior circumstances (aka cancer journey, job hunting, etc). Yet, we made it. The Lord brought us to the promised land... kind of.
Why kind of, Coral? Because we are jobless. We are renting, which means we our roots will not go too deep here and that is a bit unsettling. We still have CA license plates. We don't have a home church. We have a tiny number of friends to call community and one family that we are doing life with. I simply feel like God hasn't completed the vision yet. Trust me, I believe HE is working on it... like a master craftsman slowly and faithfully plugging away at the creation his mind and hands are desperate to create.
So, why did I title this post "Rest"? Because I feel that is the word that describes where we are right now. We are in a season of plenty where we can simply rest. It is a glorious place to be. We can walk and talk with the Lord with no distractions. We can pour into each member of this family without having to run off to work or school or... or... or... We have plenty. We are not in a state of deep need or want. We are enjoying the Idahoness of our physical surroundings (ie kind people, slow pace, lack of vulgarity, lack of selfishness and greed, surplus of genuine and helpful people, etc). My PTSD is being rolled back. I no longer have adrenaline begin to seathe through my body when I hear loud music. I no longer feel the need to start praying for strength and emotional, mental protection whenever my car is headed in the direction of home. I no longer long to be out of CA... because I am.
Did you know the Bible mentions "rest" a lot. The reference that best fits our current season is probably Matt 11:28-30:
28 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
I had to surrender a ton... my timeline, my desires, my plan, my expectations, my mental heath, my family, my friends, my network, my comforts, my present, my future, and much more. Often, I would leave these things at the cross in prayer but when I was done praying I would pick them back up. Can you relate? What things, awful or precious, do you need to surrender in the name of peace and in the hopes of sharing the yoke with the Lord? I am not done surrendering, by the way. I still have to daily surrender the unknown of our current situtation. Can I tell you a little secret? It gets a little easier to surrender each time. I, in no way, shape, or form, have mastered this. I simply no it's something I need to do and I try to do it sooner each time.
It's incredible how much peace one can have in such a short amount of time when circumstances change. Yesterday, we packed up the hotel room and moved down the street to our longer-term rental house. We went from a single room with two beds, a TINY kitchenette (is that redundant?), single bathroom, no yard... to a 1,000sqft house with two complete bedrooms (3 beds), a bathroom, a nice sized kitchen, laundry facilities, a living room, a dining room, and TWO yards. The backyard contains food-producing vegetation! Huzzah. Saoirse (seer-shuh) LOVES the space, as do the rest of us. Kamatz? Well, he likes it under the master bed. Cats.
The air is fresh and it has a sort of crispness to it. Being able to open windows and let that air in makes us all happy in ways we can't explain. Sawyer just came in with a sappy look on his face and declared "it smells so good outside!"
We have a garden an a half! A half? Yep. I say half because the second section only houses tomatoes and bell peppers whereas the main garden area houses raspberries, beets, carrots, cucumbers, squash, and a melon I think. There is also a yellow apple tree. So much fun having an established garden again.
Out front there is a tree with long green bean-looking things. What a mess! Those things drop and all but cover the front yard. So, we will have some yardwork to do but that's good for the body, the soul, and for putting our boys to work when us adults don't want to use our body anymore. *wink*
The boys have thoroughly enjoyed having a room to themselves again. The two beds has been wonderful and the table and chairs in there has provided the perfect Lego building location. It is so helpful to have a space for them to go if they need time apart from each other. That doesn't happen often, but it does happen. Also, we enjoy having TWO DOORS between them and us at night. *wink, wink*
Jake and I are living it up thanks to having a bedroom of our own again. Being able to hang clothes, have separate drawers, a laundry hamper, end tables, windows, table lamps, a place for my salt lamp and essential oil box... glorious! We also set up the computer in there so we can watch our nightly guilty pleasure of Big Bang Theory after we put the boys to bed. Once that's done the whole setup gets turned off. No extra EMFs desired, thank you very much.
This house is wonderfully located for the things we enjoy. The freeway is close. Dutch Bros is close. Parks are close. Downtown in close. The church we might attend is close. It's wonderful.
Oh, the church... we visited Whitney Baptist Church yesterday. We enjoyed it. It was wonderful to be recognized as new! So many lovely, welcoming people. It's been a long time since we've attended a Sunday School Class, Jake and I. Honestly, we've never attended one together. So, this move to Idaho has been a real treat in this regard. I have Jake with me, right next to me, on Sundays for church. Thank you, Lord. The boys had classes themselves and then sat with us for the second service. While I love having the boys with us for a sermon and worship music, it is hard on Dempsey. He simply has too much energy to sit still and take in an adult message. So, I caved and let him have my cell phone. I need to find a Biblical coloring book for him to work through during this part of church.
Yesterday's message was on Colossians 2:6-15. Like the pastor stated at the beginning, we didn't not get through it all. Such a meaty passage to unpack and I LOVE how he doesn't water it down in an effort to blow through it. He will adjust his plan to accommodate taking more time with this passage. Sawyer enjoyed the experience overall. He's telling me his favortie part was towards the end when the pastor was explaining that while traditions are not bad, they become bad when they become more important that the reason we started them. From his Sunday School class he enjoyed receiving some visuals of the 10 Commandments to help him remember them in order.
Dempsey enjoyed his class, worked to remember new friends' names, and enjoyed being able to meet and play with new kiddos. Like I mentioned before, it was hard for him to sit (still) with us during the worship service. We'll work on making that more enjoyable for him.
Oh, I forgot to tell you, this house is fully furnished. How awesome is that? See, the owner was going to AirBnB it (which usually means it's totally furnished and people can just rent it short-term) but decided we were worth leasing to for awhile. As a fellow believer, she was interested in helping a Christian, cancer-fighting family out in their transition time. What. A. Blessing.
We are eager to see where God will take us and have us put down roots. We are meeting such amazing people all across the valley that it makes it both difficult and fun trying to figure out where we'd like to be. We have met lovely people in just about each city in the valley. Of course, people who live in those cities think we should more to their city. It is comical to hear people talk about traffic or visiting another city as taking forever to get to. We chuckle because it used to take us 15 minutes to go 2-2.5 miles! Now, we can cover 30 miles in about 30 minutes. It is just not apples to apples. Yes, they have traffic.... for what they know. Let me just tell my CA peeps something - IT'S NOTHING LIKE THE TRAFFIC YOU KNOW! During rush hour, you're still moving at around 50mph. Even the busiest street (Eagle Rd) that's most congested moves because there are lights to govern the drivers. Is it annoying? Yes. Is it downright maddening, not in the least. It just goes to show the stark difference between life here (in the growing valley) compared to life in SoCal (the newest sardine can). For me, aside from people we love, CA has nothing on Idaho. Nothing.
Jake here to share about some of our recent activities.
Discovery Center of Idaho on the free admission day (thanks for the tip from local friend Haley!). Check out the giant sized Lite Brite. The boys loved the human-powered pulley basket & flywheel.
Dempsey’s first chemo infusion at St Luke’s MSTI (we’ve learned is pronounced “misty”) in Boise. Overall it went well, but it takes a bit of getting used to new/different ways of doing the same things. Dempsey did great, of course!
Many trips to local parks… Manitou, Terry Day (with the epic sitting zip line run), Settlers (Splash Pad), Shoshone, Morris Hill, Armstrong, Nampa Dog Park, etc. As of yesterday, Dempsey is now free-soloing on the hanging zip line.
Third visit to Eagle Island State Park for more playground and water fun. Dempsey is building his confidence thanks to some support from a life vest. Saorise got into an epic gladiatorial skirmish with a friendly dog.
Dawn and Sunrise adventures with Saorise in nearby Vista Neighborhood et al; spending the walking time listening to podcasts, watching the Space Station flyover (it almost collided with the moon!!), exploring along the Boise River Greenbelt, chasing squirrels and ducks, and first visit to a fenced-in Dog Park (Morris Hill).
Last week I introduced Sawyer to Stanley Kubrick’s 2001: A Space Odyssey at a screening on Boise’s big IMAX screen (he liked it).
Driving/exploration of Melba, the outskirts of Birds of Prey National Preserve (a stones throw away from Celebration Park at the Snake River) and other parts unknown.
Visit to the Warhawk Air Museum in Nampa. Great vintage airplanes and displays. (Dempsey really enjoyed the scavenger hunt and Sawyer liked seeing the various weapons on display)
Occasional shopping at Costco, Trader Joes, and Albertsons (will explore Natural Grocers soon).
Recent cheats: Papa Johns (thank you Heaths!), Chipotlé, Smashburger. Otherwise we do lots of PB&J and Salads.
In Room, we spend time playing Wii, reading books, playing legos, playing our new game (Kingdomino), watching Handy Manny episodes and various movies, eating popcorn, and generally trying to stay sane.
Last night’s movie night (since Coral was out for a NeoLife workshop) was Star Wars The Phantom Menace, complete with Life-Goes-On for dinner.
Looking forward to moving into a rental this week.
Thanks all for your prayers and support!
We went exploring again. This time, Jake landed us at Kristin Armstrong Park. Our family is thoroughly enjoying all the parks around and the intentionality Idaho places on making things family friendly. This park is right next to the Boise River and there is the Morrison Knudsen Nature Center attached to it - including white sturgeon in a pond lined with a sample beaver habitat and a butterfly garden, complete with a Little Free Library.
You will notice the last three pictures do not represent a park. However, they do represent exploration of a different sort... food. Jake found Boise Fry Co even before we moved from CA. What a find! It is some delicious food. The variety of potato choices is fun, but limited if you're wanting organic options. The patty choices are solid - beef, bison, turkey, veggie, etc. The guys had beef but I chose the bison. YUM. Add to their multiple potato options the plethora of dry seasonings and dipping sauces and you have a smorgasbord that tickles your palate.
We have been exploring nearby cities recently, trying to locate some neighborhoods we would like to live in. This is a HARD thing because we really can't tell enough about a "hood" without living in it or knowing someone who does.
There is a neighborhood in Middleton that holds a special place in our heart because it holds people who are special to us. Middleton is on the outskirts of the Treasure Valley and still has a small town feel to it. I both love that and am concerned by that. There is space, a person can breathe out there... but boy is it unnerving to drive down country roads at night... with NO streetlights. Here's Middleton...
We drove around Meridian today and really like many of the early 90's neighborhoods. The trees are mature, sidewalks exist, the lots are decent sizes, and the homes are not cookie-cutter sytle. We've heard Meridian is where lots of CA runaways land and I'm not sure I want to be around that... I would rather be immersed in Idaho culture.
We drove all the way out to Idaho City to take a look last week. Definitely will not be putting that on the list of possible places to land. It's charming to visit but not where I want to live.
Boise is nice but I find myself wanting to live away from a "big city". Yes, there is a lot of culture in Boise, and I am just fine driving to it rather than living in it.
Eagle is lovely and mostly out of our price range. It's another CA runaway location, probably because it still has a familiar feel to CA. Man, those neighborhoods sure are pretty!
Each city really has its own feel, so there really is something for everyone. It's been kinda funny talking to people about moving to the Valley and trying to find a place to land. They each have their own take on which cities/ areas are preferable. I shouldn't be surprised, and I'm not, really... it's just humorous because no one seems to agree. That just goes to show the diversity of citizens up here and it's wonderful.
Suffice it to say, wherever we land, we hope to have enough room for you to come and visit.
What do you do when you’re living in a hotel and don’t have a job to race off to each day? Go exploring, that’s what! This exploration excursion took us 42 miles north to Banks, a shore of the Payette River. My favorite kind of “beach” is one along a fresh water river.
Enjoy some photos.